2 hours. Sigh. Strap in, kids. Can't wait to see how they're going to fill 120 minutes...oh, they've got performances from the cast of "Stomp Out Loud", the Hoff (oh God, help us all) and "surprise guest stars" (one of whom I know from the promos is the cranky duo Quick Change from last season.) First off is the mandatory recap of last week's action - and then, kicking off tonight's entertaiment cavalcade are the America's Got Talent dancers (say what?) and the top 10 finalists singing "Celebration". Well, all of them singing except for Sideswipe and the Calypso Tumblers, of course. Yikes. It's going to be a long night, isn't it? 

Ok, now I'm curious as to how NBC is planning to fill 90 minutes, as only 4 acts are supposed to perform tonight. Why do I see Boy Shakira and Kashif in my future? Well, there's lots of filler already, contestant cliche montage, intro of the judges and a slightly awkward introduction of the final 8, while pyro fizzles in the background. The first act to move on (in no particular order, of course) is America's favorite bar singer (yes, I'm a hater - I'm for Fator! Mark my words, if Terry Fator doesn't make the final 4, I will not be writing a recap next week. I'll post as to who won, but no witty recap) - Cas Haley. This week, to fill the 90 minutes (couldn't they just have an hour-long "Singing Bee" or something?) each finalist is performing twice - once with a judge request and once with what they feel is their "million dollar performance". The judges choose the Elvis song "Can't Help Falling in Love" (hoping to hear the UB40 version, according to Hoff.) Cas delivered a fine performance. If I had nickel beers with this, I'd be perfectly content. Another ok performance in my book. Hoff said he brought his own style to the song. Sharon says he's found his comfort zone and lost his nerves and jitters. Piers said although not as good as Elvis, he's gone from a "guy jamming on the beach" to a bonafide star. Are these people listening to the same performance I am?

Why, oh why are they stretching this out to 90 minutes? This week, the open wasn't quite as "bells and whistles" as it's been in the past few weeks. It's "Heroes Night", the contestants are dedicating their performances to the people who have inspired them. Awww.... Of course, it's obligatory recap time. As the top ten were introduced, I saw the Tyler Perry wannabe in the crowd. Oh God, not again...I hope this isn't how they're filling the 90 minutes - with the annoying acts that were already kicked off. Unless they bring back Leonid, of course.

Tonight the top 10 perform. But first, we have to find out what 5 acts survived last week's semi-finals. And...they are ventriliquist Terry Fator (deservedly so), the Calypso Tumblers, America's favorite bar singer Cas Haley, the whitest group to ever attempt to rock La Bamba, the Duttons (I'm shocked) and umm...country crooner Jason Pritchett? His good looks must have been able to cover for a rather lackluster performance last week. I think a capella rockers The Fault Line were robbed. At least, at least they didn't push through Boy Shakira/Britney. Sharon says there are a couple of acts in the top 10 that she can't believe made it to the top 10 (could they possibly be the Duttons and Pritchett?) Tonight, the audience will vote, and 2 acts will be eliminated. So, let's get this going.

It's time for the last 10 performers to show America that they, indeed, have talent. (Questionable, really...). First up, it's the cliche montage. ("It's time to take it to the next level", "It's make or break time",  you've heard 'em all before.) First up are Orlando's own 2nd Story Guys (aka "the stilt guys") They did their routine to "Turn the Beat Around" (the Gloria E. version.) Lots of flips, kicks, cartwheels and backbends - and, unfortunately, garishly loud disco suits (guess your wardrobe choies are limited when you're 10 feet tall!) Piers liked them and thought they delivered a promising start to the 90-minute extravaganza, Sharon called them "infectious", Hoff says they've "grown" since he last saw them (what a card.)

It's already semi-finals time, and time for America to play judge. They certainly can't do much worse than Piers, Sharon and Hoff (reminder - both Boy Shakira and Kashif are in the semi-finals. Need I say more?) 10 performers are up tonight. Jerry announces that this year there's a bigger set band and audience. Whoopee. The judges still get to express their opinions and still have their buzzers - as Hoff said, "Everyone's entitled to Piers' opinion." The finalists are dragged out on stage - is this the best talent the country's got? Sad, really.

And now there are 20. First is an update on Ivan, who is back on his feet and back in front of the judges. That's the good news. Sharon informs him that he won't be moving on. We'll see him next year. The tension backstage is palpable. Country crooner Jason Pritchett has a conflict - he has to be at his cruise ship job or he'll be fired. He (wisely) leaves to save his job. I mean, he's cute, but he'd never take home the big money. Will the judges decide to give him a pass anyway? We'll find out later. (Besides, I don't think a singer is going to take it this year. I mean, Bianca who?) The judges deliberate over the remaining contestants (Hoff is wearing a scary-tight pleathery shirt.) There's a whole lot of squabbling, but they finally agree that they have "something for everyone". If Leonid isn't moving on, they don't have something for me, so don't speak so quickly for America, Hoff!

It's time for the Las Vegas callbacks for our talented performers - and Boy Shakira. 70 acts have made it to Sin City - only 20 will be sent to the finals - who's going to be the other 19 joining my boy Leonid the Magnificent (I hope, I hope)? This time around, there's no audience. Sharon tells the hopefuls, "Don't waste this opportunity...show us what entertainment is all about." Each act gets 3 minutes. The group is split into 2 categories - music and variety. After the callbacks, 35 acts stay and 35 go. The remaining 35 are whittled down to the 20 acts that will compete in the finals. They then send the gang out into the wilds of Vegas to see "Stomp". Leonid "loved it, loved it loved it!" (resplendent in a fabulous floral hat.) Other Vegas diversions included a performance by the Blue Man Group, the obligatory gambling, meeting the cast of "Phantom of the Opera". My hubby's on his way to Vegas right now - makes me wish I had smuggled myself along in his bag.

It's the last night of auditions and tonight AGT's in the Big Apple. The judges are hoping for some big talent. Let's see what NYC has in store for us. First up, a small chest. Not much to look at, until a man comes out of it. It's The Rubberboy, a very, very limber contortionist. All I can say about his act is "Ow!" This is a man who can literally put his head up his own ass. As the judges assess his performance, we get this gem from the Hoff; "You hurt me Rubberboy!" (I need this drop for a ringtone!) and Rubberboy stretches his fame out for another 15 minutes. Abenz, an aspiring rapper, says he's the "next big thing". He and his back-up singer Byrain are quite dapper, but as a rapper, he leaves little to be desired. The judges actually like Byrain and ask him to come back later and perform solo. Guess that friendship is over. Before the commercial, we see a vaguely familiar character on screen. Oh NBC, please make my evening...

As evidenced by the title of this recap, Jer-ry and the gang roll into the Windy City in search of talent. Jerry assures us that there is talent in this toddlin' town (which is home to his other show - whichscares me a little.) Our first performer is Consuelo Campbell, who is a composer/performer. She's going to perform a mix of Gregorian chant, blues and gospel - something she calls "Integral diversity." This doesn't look good. Piers buzzed her right off the bat. Her voice was fine for the chant, but her operatic style was definitely not suited for the blues. Or gospel. She isn't moving on. Sharon's confused. Piers said Consuelo looked like "Hillary Clinton on acid." Next is Sideswipe an extreme martial arts group (and finally, after 3 weeks, a little something for the ladies!) They were on last year, but an an injury sideswiped them. Ba dump dump. Their mix of martial arts and acrobatics wins over the audience (especially the female ones) and the judges - especially Sharon, who loved the boys' aggressiveness and moves. She wondered what their night moves were like. Oh be-have, girlfriend! The boys, of course, get a second chance.