<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<feed xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom">
  <title>The Recapist</title>
  <subtitle>We Watch. We Recap</subtitle>
  <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com"/>
  <link rel="self" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.recapist.com/atom/feed"/>
  <id>http://www.recapist.com/atom/feed</id>
  <updated>2009-01-18T22:06:50-08:00</updated>
  <entry>
    <title>Spying Theoriginalspy: The Doctor Who Post</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/07/23/spying-theoriginalspy-the-doctor-who-post" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/07/23/spying-theoriginalspy-the-doctor-who-post</id>
    <published>2009-07-23T21:25:35-07:00</published>
    <updated>2009-07-23T21:25:54-07:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Theoriginalspy</name>
    </author>
    <category term="Doctor Who" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p>While we&#39;re wrapping up with 10/Tennant and awaiting 11/Smith, we do have a few specials. This post is for anyone interested in continuing to read my take on the Whoniverse, and say, off the top of my head, ultimate geeks at sci-fi cons who asked me where I went.   </p>
<p>Just like with all the other shows, this post will l<a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/search/label/Doctor%20Who">ead the way to all things Whovian on I, Spy</a> . </p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p>While we&#39;re wrapping up with 10/Tennant and awaiting 11/Smith, we do have a few specials. This post is for anyone interested in continuing to read my take on the Whoniverse, and say, off the top of my head, ultimate geeks at sci-fi cons who asked me where I went.   </p>
<p>Just like with all the other shows, this post will l<a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/search/label/Doctor%20Who">ead the way to all things Whovian on I, Spy</a> . </p>
<p>For instance, are you looking for the special, &quot;The Next Doctor?&quot;  <a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/07/percolated-recap-doctor-who-next-doctor.html">Try here!</a></p>
<p>(I wasn&#39;t kidding about the ultimate geek title, he actually won said title!  I watched it happen!) </p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>Spying Theoriginalspy: The Torchwood Post</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/07/02/spying-theoriginalspy-the-torchwood-post" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/07/02/spying-theoriginalspy-the-torchwood-post</id>
    <published>2009-07-02T17:37:52-07:00</published>
    <updated>2009-07-04T17:29:06-07:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Theoriginalspy</name>
    </author>
    <category term="Torchwood" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p>While we haven&#39;t had much from the <em>Torchwood </em>part of the Whoniverse for a long time, we&#39;re all gearing up for he mini season 3, which will air in the UK next week.</p>
<p>In preparation for that, I&#39;m posting the links to the few <em>Torchwood </em>items I&#39;ve been able to post -- but I&#39;m seriously looking forward to &quot;Children of Earth&quot; and all the Janto-ness that will come with it (pun intended).</p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p>While we haven&#39;t had much from the <em>Torchwood </em>part of the Whoniverse for a long time, we&#39;re all gearing up for he mini season 3, which will air in the UK next week.</p>
<p>In preparation for that, I&#39;m posting the links to the few <em>Torchwood </em>items I&#39;ve been able to post -- but I&#39;m seriously looking forward to &quot;Children of Earth&quot; and all the Janto-ness that will come with it (pun intended).</p>
<p>To start:  <a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/02/extra-froth-how-to-make-trailer.html">How to make a trailer, <em>Torchwood </em>style</a> . </p>
<p>Next, the instacap for the radio play, <a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/07/instacap-torchwood-asylum-radio-play.html">&quot;Asylum.&quot; </a></p>
<p>Also, the <a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/07/instacap-torchwood-golden-age-radio.html">instacap for &quot;Golden Age,&quot;</a>  the second radio play of the week. </p>
<p>Finally, the Janto-y goodness of <a href="hxxp://www.megaupload.com/?d=WCPTUU80">&quot;The Dead Line.&quot; </a>It turned me into a big pile of fangirly goo. </p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>Spying Theoriginalspy: The Numb3rs Post</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/07/01/spying-theoriginalspy-the-numb3rs-post" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/07/01/spying-theoriginalspy-the-numb3rs-post</id>
    <published>2009-07-01T20:18:14-07:00</published>
    <updated>2009-07-01T20:19:07-07:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Theoriginalspy</name>
    </author>
    <category term="Numb3rs" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p>So, it&#39;s been months now since Recapist officially ceased recapping, but some of us (a phrase which here means, me, Theoriginalspy) have continued on in our own venues. Others who have continued are Annie (who has nicely posted some teasers here) and <a href="http://travelling-one.blogspot.com/">Travellingone</a>, who hadto finish <em>Life on Mars</em> and give <em>Castle </em>a shot.</p>
<p>Just to make sure I&#39;m easily found, I&#39;m posting master lists (thanks to Michael, my former boss) of everything recapped since Recapist shut down.  This one, features the rest of the season of <em>Numb3rs</em>.</p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p>So, it&#39;s been months now since Recapist officially ceased recapping, but some of us (a phrase which here means, me, Theoriginalspy) have continued on in our own venues. Others who have continued are Annie (who has nicely posted some teasers here) and <a href="http://travelling-one.blogspot.com/">Travellingone</a>, who hadto finish <em>Life on Mars</em> and give <em>Castle </em>a shot.</p>
<p>Just to make sure I&#39;m easily found, I&#39;m posting master lists (thanks to Michael, my former boss) of everything recapped since Recapist shut down.  This one, features the rest of the season of <em>Numb3rs</em>.</p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/02/percolated-recap-numb3rs-trouble-in.html">Eppesode 513: Trouble in Chinatown </a> The one where they rip off a plot from <em>Bones</em>.</p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/02/percolated-recap-numb3rs-sneakerhead_13.html">Eppesode 514:  Sheakerhead</a>   The one where we get our kicks from kicks. </p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/02/percolated-recap-numb3rs-guilt-trip_20.html">Eppesode 515: Guilt Trip</a>   The one with Captain Spike!</p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/03/percolated-recap-numb3rs-cover-me.html">Eppesode 516: Cover Me </a>  The one where I&#39;m infinitely jealous of Liz&#39;s wardrobe.</p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/03/percolated-recap-numb3rs-first-law.html">Eppesode 517: First Law</a>   The one with all the sci-fi references. </p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/03/percolated-recap-numb3rs-1201-am.html">Eppesode 518: 12:01am</a>   The one that left me with a serious case of depression. </p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/04/percolated-recap-numb3rs-animal-rites_21.html">Eppesode 519: Animal Rites</a>   The one with Polly Walker!</p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/04/percolated-recap-numb3rs-fifth-man.html">Eppesode 520:  The Fifth Man</a>   The one where Don gets stabbed, freaking out the fandom! </p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/05/percolated-recap-numb3rs-disturbed.html">Eppesode 521:  Disturbed</a>   The 100th eppesode (and recap) full of Easter Eggs!</p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/05/percolated-recap-numb3rs-greatest-hits.html">Eppesode 522:  Greatest Hits </a>  The one where the Fonz is an ass.</p>
<p><a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/2009/06/percolated-recap-numb3rs-angels-and.html">Eppesode 523 Angels and Demons </a>  The one where Edgerton determines exactly how cool Nikki is. </p>
<p>Soon enough, I&#39;ll be posting master lists for <a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/search/label/Dollhouse"><em>Dollhouse </em></a> and <a href="http://theoriginalspy.blogspot.com/search/label/Torchwood"><em>Torchwood (and other parts of the Whoniverse</em></a>.  Stay tuned! </p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>CSI: Unfriendly Skies (Episode 109)</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/03/25/csi-unfriendly-skies-episode-109" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/03/25/csi-unfriendly-skies-episode-109</id>
    <published>2009-03-25T12:26:20-07:00</published>
    <updated>2009-03-25T12:26:20-07:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Annie</name>
    </author>
    <category term="CSI" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p>Previously on <em>CSI</em>, I recapped the <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=16">pilot</a>  and <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=25">“Cool Change”</a> and then you guys voted for me to recap “Unfriendly Skies” next. This means we’re going to miss the Grissom/Sara face touching and “tie me up” scenes in “Crate ‘n Burial,” Nicky’s pretty tears in “Who Are You?,” and a wee Dakota Fanning in “Blood Drops.” I think y’all need to take a moment and really think about what you’ve done. <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=69">Read the rest of the recap at my blog!</a></p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p>Previously on <em>CSI</em>, I recapped the <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=16">pilot</a>  and <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=25">“Cool Change”</a> and then you guys voted for me to recap “Unfriendly Skies” next. This means we’re going to miss the Grissom/Sara face touching and “tie me up” scenes in “Crate ‘n Burial,” Nicky’s pretty tears in “Who Are You?,” and a wee Dakota Fanning in “Blood Drops.” I think y’all need to take a moment and really think about what you’ve done. <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=69">Read the rest of the recap at my blog!</a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=69"></a></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>CSI: Cool Change (Episode 102)</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/03/08/csi-cool-change-episode-102" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/03/08/csi-cool-change-episode-102</id>
    <published>2009-03-07T21:26:38-08:00</published>
    <updated>2009-03-07T21:26:38-08:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Annie</name>
    </author>
    <category term="CSI" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p>Previously on <em>CSI</em>, Holly Gribbs had a crappy first day, then it got better, and then it truly turned into the shittiest day ever when she was shot. This is what comes from taking Catherine’s advice.</p>
<p>It turns out that Holly’s shooting doesn’t bring the city to a screeching halt. Who knew? A couple right out of “New Jersey trash” central casting are bickering in a casino. She wants to give one of the $20 slot machines a whirl but he thinks it’s a waste of time and money. However, her screeching wears him down enough to try out a machine, which is just being abandoned by a dejected loser. Mr. Jersey pulls the handle once then twice with no result, as he expected. He yanks the handle a third time and starts walking back over to Mrs. Jersey without seeing the result. Mrs. Jersey’s delighted shrieks and the clanging alarms clue him in that he’s just won approximately a gajillion dollars. <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=25">Read the rest of the recap at my blog!</a> </p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p>Previously on <em>CSI</em>, Holly Gribbs had a crappy first day, then it got better, and then it truly turned into the shittiest day ever when she was shot. This is what comes from taking Catherine’s advice.</p>
<p>It turns out that Holly’s shooting doesn’t bring the city to a screeching halt. Who knew? A couple right out of “New Jersey trash” central casting are bickering in a casino. She wants to give one of the $20 slot machines a whirl but he thinks it’s a waste of time and money. However, her screeching wears him down enough to try out a machine, which is just being abandoned by a dejected loser. Mr. Jersey pulls the handle once then twice with no result, as he expected. He yanks the handle a third time and starts walking back over to Mrs. Jersey without seeing the result. Mrs. Jersey’s delighted shrieks and the clanging alarms clue him in that he’s just won approximately a gajillion dollars. <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=25">Read the rest of the recap at my blog!</a> </p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>CSI: Pilot (Episode 101)</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/02/03/csi-pilot-episode-101" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/02/03/csi-pilot-episode-101</id>
    <published>2009-02-03T14:00:55-08:00</published>
    <updated>2009-03-06T13:46:25-08:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Annie</name>
    </author>
    <category term="CSI" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p><em>Big thanks to Michael for giving me permission to post the teaser and link to my classic CSI recaps on my blog. </em></p>
<p>Let&#39;s go back to where it all began, October 6, 2000. Grissom was a spazzy flirt, Catherine could move her face, Brass was an asshole, Nicky was the n00biest n00b to ever n00b, Warrick was still alive, Greg ruled the lab, and as for Sara...well, I&#39;ll get to her in the next recap.</p>
<p>The POV switches back and forth between the Las Vegas skyline and a hand loading a gun with bullets. Um, that might have been redundant. It&#39;s not like you guys were thinking the gun was being loaded with cheese or shampoo or something. Anyway, we hear a man&#39;s voice: &quot;My name is Royce Harmon. I reside at 7642 Carpenter Street, Las Vegas, Nevada. I am 41 years of age...and I&#39;m going to kill myself. I&#39;d like to say &#39;I love you&#39; to my mother Paige and my sister Gina. I&#39;m so sorry. I never wanted to put you through this. I just can&#39;t do it anymore. I love you, Mom.&quot; Then, a shot rings out. <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=16">Read the full recap at my blog!</a></p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p><em>Big thanks to Michael for giving me permission to post the teaser and link to my classic CSI recaps on my blog. </em></p>
<p>Let&#39;s go back to where it all began, October 6, 2000. Grissom was a spazzy flirt, Catherine could move her face, Brass was an asshole, Nicky was the n00biest n00b to ever n00b, Warrick was still alive, Greg ruled the lab, and as for Sara...well, I&#39;ll get to her in the next recap.</p>
<p>The POV switches back and forth between the Las Vegas skyline and a hand loading a gun with bullets. Um, that might have been redundant. It&#39;s not like you guys were thinking the gun was being loaded with cheese or shampoo or something. Anyway, we hear a man&#39;s voice: &quot;My name is Royce Harmon. I reside at 7642 Carpenter Street, Las Vegas, Nevada. I am 41 years of age...and I&#39;m going to kill myself. I&#39;d like to say &#39;I love you&#39; to my mother Paige and my sister Gina. I&#39;m so sorry. I never wanted to put you through this. I just can&#39;t do it anymore. I love you, Mom.&quot; Then, a shot rings out. <a href="http://anniemoon.net/?p=16">Read the full recap at my blog!</a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>Lost: &quot;Jughead&quot; - Episode 503</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/30/lost-jughead-episode-503" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/30/lost-jughead-episode-503</id>
    <published>2009-01-30T08:14:59-08:00</published>
    <updated>2009-01-30T08:14:59-08:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>littlebigmouth</name>
    </author>
    <category term="Lost" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<div>Welcome back, everybody. Like I told you last week, this isn&#39;t a full recap of last night&#39;s episode of &#39;Lost&#39;. It&#39;s just a handful or two of random thoughts bouncing around in my brain after watching &#39;Jughead&#39;. Thanks so much to pandabear and Maisy for dropping me some emails and comments, by the way. Great to hear from the both of you. Without further ado, let&#39;s jump right into &#39;Jughead&#39;. More hot not-recap action after the jump...</div>
<div> </div>
<div>
<br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<div>Welcome back, everybody. Like I told you last week, this isn&#39;t a full recap of last night&#39;s episode of &#39;Lost&#39;. It&#39;s just a handful or two of random thoughts bouncing around in my brain after watching &#39;Jughead&#39;. Thanks so much to pandabear and Maisy for dropping me some emails and comments, by the way. Great to hear from the both of you. Without further ado, let&#39;s jump right into &#39;Jughead&#39;. More hot not-recap action after the jump...</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>So let&#39;s get right to the 900-lb. gorilla in the room, shall we? Charles Widmore was on the island as some sort of Other back in 1954! I&#39;d had a hunch about this since we first saw him last week threatening to chop off Julia&#39;s hand, so I was glad to see it actually turn out to be true this time around. However, here&#39;s a question for you - being that the Widmore we saw on the island in the past was little more than a lowly Other under the firm rule of Richard Alpert, how exactly does it come to be that the present-day Widmore seems to think that the island is his? Being that we&#39;ve seen a lot of history repeat itself so far this season, I&#39;m guessing that the young Widmore&#39;s rise to power will mirror that of Ben&#39;s a few decades later.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Widmore&#39;s reveal led to my favorite line of the night, and this time, it was from Locke. &quot;Did you say your name was Charles Widmore?&quot; &quot;Yes, what of it?&quot; &quot;Nothing. Nice to meet you.&quot; Accordingly, my favorite shot of the night came right after Young Widmore claimed that Locke couldn&#39;t possibly have tracked him back to Richard&#39;s camp. How would some &#39;old man&#39; know this island better than him, right? Well, wrong, apparently. The words were barely out of his mouth when we cut to a straight shot of the back of Locke&#39;s bald head staring down into Richard Alpert&#39;s camp, having just done what he does best. Very iconic and cool.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Besides the drop-dead cool reveal of Widmore, though, I think my favorite moment of the episode had to be when Locke basically invited Richard Alpert to come visit him as a child. Why? Because it actually took place! Remember last season when we saw Alpert come to see Locke as a boy, presenting him with all kinds of random items and asking which of them he thought already belonged to him, one of which was the compass?</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Let&#39;s talk Ellie for a moment. You know Ellie - the pretty blonde girl with the great big rifle that escorted Faraday out to the hydrogen bomb on the island. Wait... a hydrogen bomb? Yes, a hydrogen bomb, but we&#39;ll get to that in a minute. The most common chatter around the internets right now is that the name &#39;Ellie&#39; is a shortened version of another name. Eloise, maybe? The first name of Mrs. Hawking, the older white-haired lady from Season 3&#39;s &#39;Flashes Before Your Eyes&#39; and last week&#39;s creepy Illuminati-style meetup with our old pal Ben, perhaps? Yes, indeed - the very same. Let&#39;s look at the similarities and clues. First off, English accent. Sure, lots of people in the world have them, but how many on LOST? Not too many. Second, the tied-up braided hairstyle is very similar to that of the elder Mrs. Hawking. Third, Faraday commented repeatedly that she reminded him of someone, but he couldn&#39;t place exactly who. Now, I&#39;m fairly certain that I&#39;d recognize my own mother if I were to travel back in time and see her early on, but what if the two haven&#39;t spoken for a while? Torn apart by an argument about the ins-and-outs of time travel, perhaps?</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Desmond and Penny&#39;s son&#39;s name is Charlie! Awwwww. Anyone who doesn&#39;t find that charming clearly has no soul. But wait, let&#39;s back up a bit here. Des and Penny have a son? Apparently so, as the episode started off with his birth. Didn&#39;t waste any time at all, did you Des? Good lad. On a different note, though, before we get too cutesy-pie in here remembering our old friend Charlie Hieronymus Pace, let us not forget that there is someone else in Desmond and Penny&#39;s world that their son might have been named after. Along with destiny, it seems that irony is very much of a fickle bitch, too.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Yet another Charlie Hume-based theory bouncing around out there is that the son of Des and Penny grows up, becomes a musician, and somehow winds up programming the musical keypad on the control panel of the Looking Glass station. Remember how the two ladies stationed down there told Charlie that it had been programmed by a musician? It&#39;s far-fetched, I know, but you gotta keep those good vibrations happening somehow.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>The Others speaking Latin was quite interesting. Sure, it be construed that they only do so as a way to keep themselves unique and enlightened, but what if there&#39;s more? What if Latin is the island&#39;s native tongue? You think it&#39;s been around that long? If so, what if there are some ancient Romans wandering around the island, even to this day? Juliet did say that Richard Alpert had &#39;always been there&#39;, didn&#39;t she? The guy doesn&#39;t seem to age too quickly, so my guess is that he really IS an ancient Roman that made his way to the island somehow and staked himself out as a leader and island elder simply by sticking around the longest. Maybe he started teaching Latin to everyone he met in exchange for them teaching him English. In kinda-sorta related news, I read a rumor somewhere earlier this summer that we&#39;ll be seeing a barefoot Richard Alpert this season, so ancient Roman or not, if he&#39;s got four toes, he&#39;s going to have some &#39;splaining to do.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>While we&#39;re talking about stuff that has nothing to do with the episode at hand, remember those food pallet drops? What if they only keep showing up because they&#39;re part of the time loops?</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Okay, the hydrogen bomb. It was explained in the episode that it&#39;s there because some Army guys showed up on the island with it, right? Well, we can also assume that it got left there because it started leaking. That&#39;s all fine and good, but let me ask you this - where is it now? We saw it on the island back in 1954, but assuming Faraday was right in his assumption that it never exploded because the island hasn&#39;t gotten, like, blown up or anything, where the hell is it? Well, there was only a single clue in &#39;Jughead&#39; that led us toward a possible answer to this question, and that clue is one word - &#39;concrete&#39;. Faraday asked Ellie if her people had any access to concrete, because the only way they were going to be able to contain the danger of the leaking hydrogen bomb was to encase it in concrete and bury it. Well, keeping that in mind, remember the Swan? The original station that Locke found way back in Season 2? Of course you do. Well, remember in the outer hallway of the Swan, there was that one wall that was completely sealed over with (gasp!) concrete? Hmm. Interesting, right? Maybe the H-bomb is behind that wall of concrete, and what&#39;s more, maybe the H-bomb is tied into the 108-minute doomsday button in the Swan station. Hell, let&#39;s take it one step further. Maybe the bomb has something to do with &#39;the Incident&#39; that Marvin Candle talked about way back in the Orientation video for the Swan. Maybe the magnetism in and around the Swan station is somehow keeping the radiation from the H-bomb contained, and for that to keep happening, somebody has to stay in the Swan station 24/7 and repeatedly press a button that will... Ah, you know the rest. But what of the failsafe key that Desmond turned? Hmm. Did that cause Jughead to release the last of its radiation, thusly setting off the electromagnetic explosion we saw at the end of Season 3?</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>I know Damon and Carleton are doing their best to keep us away from Star Trek-style time paradoxes, but check this out - where did the compass originally come from? Locke couldn&#39;t have given Richard the compass unless Richard gave it to him first. Conversely, Richard couldn&#39;t have given Locke the compass without receiving it from Locke first. Confused yet? Good. This is a classic example of an unending time loop paradox, but I think I might&#39;ve cracked it. There are two compasses. One that Richard (or Locke) originally had, and one that entered this weird time-loop thingamajig. What will happen if they meet? Remember the bunnies in the Orchid orientation video that Marvin Candle was so insistent to keep apart? Hmm.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Why didn&#39;t Locke kill young Widmore when he had the chance? I know he said it was because he was one of his people, but I&#39;m not buying that. Locke&#39;s very much in touch with what the island wants and needs, and when he raised that rifle, I&#39;m betting dollars to Dharmalars that the island told him SPECIFICALLY to not pull the trigger. The island can&#39;t have a dead Widmore lying around 50 years before all of this Flight 815 business even starts to happen, can it? As evil as he might be, Charles Widmore has a very significant role in all of this whether we like it or not.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Also, did the scene where Locke couldn&#39;t shoot Widmore give anyone else flashbacks? Remember back when Locke couldn&#39;t bring himself to shoot the undercover cop who just busted him and his friends at the marijuana farm? Watch that scene again and tell me it isn&#39;t a direct mirror of the Locke/Widmore standoff from this week. This wasn&#39;t exactly the first time we&#39;ve seen history repeating itself here in Season 5, you know. Remember last week when Sawyer got a thorn in his foot? Reminded me a lot of the time when he and Kate were walking back from the cages at the Hydra station and he got one of the Swan&#39;s dartboard darts stuck in his boot. Keep your eyes peeled for more moments like this, everyone. Since the Lostaways still on the island are basically wandering around in their own past and seeing history repeat itself FOR REAL, I&#39;m sure we haven&#39;t seen the last of their kind.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>On that topic, you know the voices that people on the island hear when they&#39;re lost in the jungle and something&#39;s about to happen? Well, given that the time-traveling Sawyer sees Kate in the jungle next week, I&#39;m willing to wager that those voices have been those of our castaways all along. Have the 815ers been watching themselves from behind the curtain of time since the very beginning?</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>What of the women in our friend Daniel Faraday&#39;s life? We&#39;ll get to the lovely (and bleeding) Charlotte in a minute, but who exactly is this woman he abandoned in England when she got deathly ill for unknown reasons? Her symptoms were rather reminiscent of this odd time-disparity sickness we&#39;re seeing on the island, isn&#39;t it? My guess is that she was Faraday&#39;s first human experiment for his time-travel work at Oxford, and after the results went completely pear-shaped, he freaked out and split. Not exactly a noble thing for Doctor Emmett Brown 2.0 to do, to say the least, but that certainly would explain it. The fact that Charles Widmore was responsible for funding both Faraday&#39;s experiments AND his female guinea pig staying alive? Well, that&#39;s something else entirely.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>As for Charlotte, oh boy. I just don&#39;t know. At first, I thought she had fallen victim to the time sickness, but it&#39;s clearly more than that. She&#39;s forgetting her mother&#39;s maiden name, having blinding headaches that keep getting worse, and above all, bleeding profusely from the nose before collapsing into Daniel&#39;s arms. I&#39;d hoped LOST wouldn&#39;t be venturing too far into Back To The Future territory with their time-travel-based shenanigans, but I&#39;ve gotta say it - something has happened in this new version of the past that isn&#39;t exactly agreeing with Charlotte&#39;s very existence. Maybe because of what Daniel and company have been doing on the island, Charlotte&#39;s parents don&#39;t meet anymore. Something like that. Remember in the Season 4 finale, she kinda sorta hinted that she had been born on the island? Interesting. Hell, maybe there&#39;s a Dharma-sponsored Enchantment Under The Sea dance to get to that we just don&#39;t know about yet. How cool would it be to have an undersea-themed dance down in the Looking Glass? That would rock.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>Speaking of Charlotte, anyone else think that the only reason Faraday said he was in love with her was to reassure her that she had a Constant? I&#39;m all for those two crazy kids hitting it off, too, but come on - Faraday seems far more occupied with what&#39;s happening to the island than getting into Charlotte&#39;s pants. For now, anyway. Besides, his declaration of love sounded a little hollow, didn&#39;t it? Nerds don&#39;t do that kind of thing very well, I guess.</div>
<div> </div>
<div></div>
<div>That&#39;s enough for now. &quot;The Little Prince&quot; is next week, and because I didn&#39;t know what the hell the title of &quot;Jughead&quot; was referencing this week, it&#39;s no surprise that I don&#39;t know what the little prince is, either. Have a clue? <a href="mailto:littlebigmouth@yummsh.com">E-mail me</a>, <a href="http://yummsh.blogspot.com" target="_blank">comment me</a>, do what you gotta do. Alright then.</div>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>Lost: &quot;Because You Left/The Lie&quot; - Episode 501</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/22/lost-because-you-left-the-lie-episode-501" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/22/lost-because-you-left-the-lie-episode-501</id>
    <published>2009-01-22T16:12:33-08:00</published>
    <updated>2009-01-22T16:12:33-08:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>littlebigmouth</name>
    </author>
    <category term="Lost" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">Hey, everyone. No, this isn&#39;t a full recap (that would take entirely too much of my unpaid time), but merely a brainfart or two to get some discussion going on this week&#39;s episode of &#39;Lost&#39;. It might be only with myself, but for now, that&#39;s just fine. Alright, here we go. More &#39;Lost&#39; after the jump...</span></p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">Hey, everyone. No, this isn&#39;t a full recap (that would take entirely too much of my unpaid time), but merely a brainfart or two to get some discussion going on this week&#39;s episode of &#39;Lost&#39;. It might be only with myself, but for now, that&#39;s just fine. Alright, here we go. More &#39;Lost&#39; after the jump...</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  So where exactly did the island go? Not in time, mind you, but in space. The actual geographic location of the island, I mean. Well, here&#39;s a thought - remember down in the Orchid station when Locke was watching the orientation video? Well, if you paid attention, it said that when the rabbit test subjects were subjected to the tests that moved them 10 milliseconds through time, it would appear for a moment as if they had disappeared. Well, I think that&#39;s what happened to the island, too. Jack and his crew up in the helicopter thought they saw the island disappear completely, but what if they actually didn&#39;t? Maybe the island subjected itself to the same kind of time-shifting that the Dharma people were testing on those rabbits, and as a result of that shift, it &#39;disappeared&#39;. I&#39;m not saying that the island doesn&#39;t move geographically, as it very obviously does. Remember when we saw Yemi&#39;s plane crash on the island as a time-displaced Locke watched it go by? Well, that plane took off from Africa, so at that moment in time, the island was located somewhere in that general vicinity. A tiny little plane like that wouldn&#39;t be able to make it all the way out to the South Pacific on its own from Africa, would it?</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Speaking of islands magically appearing in random places all over the globe, wouldn&#39;t that kind of explain how the Black Rock got so far inland on the island? Land ho!</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Why do the Oceanic 6 really need to come back? Well, one of two theories are running around in my brain. First, those six people need to be on the island for whatever reason so that time itself can play out as it is supposed to. Second, the Oceanic Six are the island&#39;s constants. Pick and choose either one of those you like.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  I called this last season, but that baby we saw with Marvin Candle/Pierre Cheng/whatever the hell that man&#39;s name is has GOT to be Miles Straum. It HAS to be. And no, not only because he&#39;s Asian. Candle&#39;s dickish behavior towards his crew in the Orchid seemed rather familiar, didn&#39;t it? Also, not only was that opening sequence just about the coolest stuff ever, but it was practically a direct mirror of our introduction to Desmond back at the top of Season 2, don&#39;t you think? Nice to hear some Willie Nelson, too.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  How bad-ass was that fight scene with Sayid and the two assassins? Death by dishwasher! It really had the feel of a Jason Bourne movie, didn&#39;t it?</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  So when do you think the scene where Juliet and Sawyer were captured by those soldiers took place? Right around World War II, maybe? The guns and uniforms those guys had on didn&#39;t exactly look current, and taking an enemies&#39; hand off just for the hell of it doesn&#39;t exactly sound like anything any modern military outfit would do now that Bush &amp; Cheney are out of office. Speaking of that scene, who do you figure the people shooting flaming arrows were? Some past incarnation of the Others, maybe?</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Speaking of flaming arrows, fan favorite Neil Frogurt made another cameo! My favorite part about that guy&#39;s backstory is that his last name might not even be Frogurt. According to <a href="http://lostpedia.wikia.com/wiki/Neil_&quot;Frogurt&quot;" target="_blank">his Lostpedia entry</a>, the only real reason anyone calls him Frogurt is because Bernard once referred to him as &quot;that guy that makes frozen yogurt.&quot; Wondering why Steve Buscemi lookalike Neil kept getting so pissed off last night when people wouldn&#39;t call him by his first name? Now you know. &quot;My name is NEIL!&quot;</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Anyone remember that &#39;Got Milk?&#39; commercial with the Aaron Burr enthusiast? <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLSsswr6z9Y" target="_blank">Watch it again</a> and see if there&#39;s anyone in it that looks familiar.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  My favorite internet theory right now is that Mrs. Hawking is Daniel Faraday&#39;s mother. Cool, right? What was even cooler was that Illuminati-type weirdness that she and Ben were up to at the end of the second hour. With all the physics calculations that she was running on that blackboard while <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foucault_pendulum" target="_blank">Foucault&#39;s Pendulum</a> clicked away behind her, it&#39;s easy to see how any son of hers might turn out to be someone like Daniel Faraday.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  If Charlotte needs a Constant to stop those nosebleeds, I&#39;m more than willing to volunteer. Man, is Rebecca Mader hot. Wow. I swear I can hear her jeans sigh contentedly every time she shows up on screen in them.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  The look on Locke&#39;s face when Ethan Rom (ETHAN ROM!) showed up pointing a rifle at him scared the crap out of me. Probably out of him, too.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Whose side is Sun on here? Widmore&#39;s? Kate&#39;s? Her own? My money&#39;s on that last option, as the woman clearly seems out for blood. I think she&#39;s playing Kate like a harmonica, myself. As she pointed out this episode, it kinda-sorta was her fault that Jin never made it onto the chopper. Or was it Jack&#39;s? Or both? I&#39;d say she&#39;s got more than a few targets to start picking through here, and her manipulation of Kate this time around was only the beginning. Once again, Yunjin Kim brings the goods.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Cheech Marin eating a caviar-and-salami sandwich while watching &#39;Expose&#39;&#39; is just about the best thing ever. You know what would be cool? If Hurley&#39;s imaginary friend Dave calls him up sometime. Dave&#39;s not here, man.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Ana-Lucia looking HOT! Wow! Boy, I bet they really had a hard time convincing Michelle Rodriguez to come back to Hawaii for a few days to have a couple drinks. Heh. I liked her advice to Hurley the most - &quot;Whatever you do, don&#39;t get arrested!&quot; Indeed. Cattiness aside, though, her mention to Hurley about Libby brought the tiniest of tears to my eye. Awwww.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  This show&#39;s attention to detail never ceases to amaze me. When Candle woke up and put the record on, there was actually a single hair on the needle, thus initiating the skip.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Speaking of detail, anyone notice the pregnant woman walking behind Marvin Candle as he walked to work? Does that mean that the island&#39;s fertility problem only started taking place after the Purge?</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  I have to add that getting an up-close, in-person visual history of the island&#39;s past through these time jumps is very, very cool. I hope they use it to tell us about everything - the Dharma Initiative, the Black Rock, the four-toed statue, who and what has been on this island in the past, everything. I&#39;m kinda hoping they don&#39;t take the &#39;Back To The Future&#39; route and start having the castaways run into past versions of themselves, but we&#39;ll see. Although, I really wouldn&#39;t mind hearing Sawyer call Faraday &#39;McFly&#39; sometime. Hell, I&#39;d even settle for &#39;Butthead&#39;.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Best part about seeing Hurley throw a Hot Pocket at Ben? Ben not even flinching. That&#39;s what.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  You know the mysterious voices that we keep hearing out in the jungle? I&#39;m thinking they might be the voices of the Others as they travel through time on the future version of the island. Thoughts?</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  There were a lot of them, but I&#39;d say the line of the night would have to go to Sawyer - &quot;Open up, it&#39;s the Ghost of Christmas Future!&quot; Either that, or Richard Alpert getting all sarcastic on Locke with &quot;It points north, John.&quot;</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Obama is president AND Lost is back? Man, life is sweet.</span></p>
<p> </p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">Thoughts? Comments? Rebecca Mader&#39;s phone number? <a href="mailto:littlebigmouth@yummsh.com">Shoot me an email</a> or <a href="http://yummsh.blogspot.com" target="_blank">visit my blog</a> any old time you please.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-family: &#39;-webkit-monospace&#39;; font-size: 13px; white-space: pre-wrap" class="Apple-style-span">  Until next week!</span></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>Rock of Love Bus - Get the Puck Out (Episode 303)</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/20/rock-of-love-bus-get-the-puck-out-episode-303" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/20/rock-of-love-bus-get-the-puck-out-episode-303</id>
    <published>2009-01-20T15:24:32-08:00</published>
    <updated>2009-01-20T15:24:32-08:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Christine M</name>
    </author>
    <category term="Rock of Love" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p><span class="inline left"><a href="/someone-had-to-say-it"><img src="http://www.recapist.com/files/images/rolbus_3_3f8_43.img_assist_custom.jpg" alt="Someone had to say it..." title="Someone had to say it..."  class="image img_assist_custom" width="450" height="338" /></a><span class="caption" style="width: 448px;"><strong>Someone had to say it...</strong></span></span> </p>
<p>Well, it&#39;s fitting that my last post for Recapist happens to be one for my favorite show. So, anyway, the sun again rises on the caravan of disease. It&#39;s Taya&#39;s week to state that it&#39;s time to step up her game. All of the girls really want Brittaney gone, especially after her racist rant against Natasha the night before. Natural Born Ashley noted that she stayed in the appropriately-named Alien Invasion room because &quot;aliens need to abduct her fat ass and bring her to somewhere else because we don’t want her&quot;. Well put. </p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p><span class="inline left"><a href="/someone-had-to-say-it"><img src="http://www.recapist.com/files/images/rolbus_3_3f8_43.img_assist_custom.jpg" alt="Someone had to say it..." title="Someone had to say it..."  class="image img_assist_custom" width="450" height="338" /></a><span class="caption" style="width: 448px;"><strong>Someone had to say it...</strong></span></span> </p>
<p>Well, it&#39;s fitting that my last post for Recapist happens to be one for my favorite show. So, anyway, the sun again rises on the caravan of disease. It&#39;s Taya&#39;s week to state that it&#39;s time to step up her game. All of the girls really want Brittaney gone, especially after her racist rant against Natasha the night before. Natural Born Ashley noted that she stayed in the appropriately-named Alien Invasion room because &quot;aliens need to abduct her fat ass and bring her to somewhere else because we don’t want her&quot;. Well put. </p>
<p>&#160;</p>
<p>Bret&#39;s &quot;Tenacious Twelve&quot; arrive in Champaign, Illinois. Kelsey says &quot;I have no clue where Champaign is, but all I know is it’s my favorite drink, so we’re going to the bottom of the bottle!&quot; (I&#39;m sure she&#39;s not the only geographically-challenged lady on this tour.) The gals meet up with Bret at an ice rink. Bret says he loves nothing more that seeing scantily clad women in freezing cold conditions. Hey, it&#39;s Skanks on Ice! Bret tells the ladies that he loves his two little girls and he needs a woman who&#39;s protective and possesses a strong maternal instinct. So once again, &quot;Baby Bret&quot; is going to be subjected to more violence as the gang participates in a rousing game of &quot;Baby Bret Hockey.&quot; The goal is to get li&#39;l Bret into his crib (the net). The ladies are split into teams and have three attempts to score. Here&#39;s the tricky part - they&#39;re facing off against the University of Illinois ladies&#39; hockey team and their honorary captain (who Bret promises will &quot;rip their faces off&quot;), awful Lacey (why won&#39;t she go away?) &quot;What&#39;s up, skanks?&quot; indeed. </p>
<p>The ladies strap on their skates and hit the ice. Brittaney claims to have once been a championship ice skater (which obviously leads to a career in porn.) Farrah is still trying to make &quot;What the French?&quot; happen (it&#39;s not happening.) Kelsey was zipping agily across the ice but Beverly was slipping and sliding all over the place. Ashley noted that she was the &quot;wackest skater of the bunch.&quot; It was them time for the ladies to split into teams before attempting to launch a baby into a net (there were actually three nets to choose from - the farther away they were, the more the teams earned if they got the baby in them.) So, here are your teams:</p>
<p>Blue Team: Natasha, Brittanya, Mindy and Taya<br />Black Team: Maria, Melissa, Brittaney and Beverly<br />Pink Team: Ashley (A-Bomb), Kelsey, Marcia and Farrah</p>
<p>The blue team is up first. They decapitate poor Baby Bret. Brittanya suffers a bloody navel (it&#39;s a good thing she didn&#39;t fall on her face and rip those dimple piercings out) and Natasha gets clocked and is left hyperventilating on the ice. But, thanks to Mindy, they score four points. The black team misses the first shot and scores one point. They then fail to realize that they need more than one point to beat the blue team and again shoot baby Bret into the one point goal. Somehow I don&#39;t think the &quot;Math Olympics&quot; will be a future challenge on this show. Beverly, it turns out, was a ringer, and she led the pink team to victory with five points. For her efforts, Melissa got a leaky boob. The girl has no idea what&#39;s in her chest and doesn&#39;t get much help from the paramedics. Ashley drops another verbal a-bomb on us by saying that &quot;If Melissa busted her breast implant playing hockey, then she got ‘em done in Tiajuana because $300 boob jobs pop for no reason, OK?&quot; Thanks for setting us straight. Back on the bus, someone smells pee (I&#39;ll bet this happens a lot, but this leads into a shocking discovery.) The gals discover that Brittaney has been stashing food in her bed and worse yet, stole all of their sweaty hockey socks. Weird and very creepy, but I guess her tootsies probably get cold on the set. </p>
<p>Bret takes the ladies on the kind of sophisticated outing you expect to see on ROL - yep, they go to a strip club. This time, however, the gals are the star attraction. (It sucks when you have to work on vacation, doesn&#39;t it?) Beverly&#39;s not having it and Bret pretty much forces her on the stage and orders her to have fun. This approach isn&#39;t working. Beverly grudgingly goes on stage, but keeps her clothes on (fortunately for Bret, the other gals have no such issues.) Bret pulls Beverly aside and asks her why she&#39;s opting for clothes. Beverly said she had three kids and didn&#39;t want them to see their Mommy pole dancing. The &quot;parent thing&quot; always seems to work on Bret, so they seem to be back on track (but Bret later confesses that he thinks Bev&#39;s a bit of a &quot;buzzkill&quot;.) </p>
<p>Back at the hotel, the gals turn their attention to Brittaney and the great sock robbery. Brittaney says she didn&#39;t steal the socks - she simply asked the manager of the rink if she could have them. Used socks...ewww! Brittaney felt like everyone was against her and went out and slept on the bus. At least she&#39;ll have warm feet! Back in the room, Melissa was loudly yapping on a cell phone to someone we can only assume was her boyfriend. She bad-mouthed Bret (and his extensions....how dare she!) and said he looked old. She also said she didn&#39;t like him as a person. Whatevs. The next day, Brittaney whined to Bret about how she felt ostracized by the rest of the girls. Bret is finally starting to figure out that this girl is crazy, and not in the crazy for rock &#39;n&#39; roll way! Melissa took her leaky boob to the doctors and the other gals couldn&#39;t wait to regale Bret with details about her late night phone call. Later on, Bret confronted Melissa who flat-out lied and told Bret that she made no such phone call. Bret said he was getting a little tired of riding Melissa&#39;s &quot;bipolar roller coaster.&quot; </p>
<p>At eliminations, Bret finally tells us what we&#39;ve known since the beginning of time. He has hair extensions - but, not just any hair extensions. Bret wants us to know that he has spent some &quot;quality money on the finest hair extensions Europe has to offer.&quot; he then gives the gals the chance to get anything they want off their chest and Melissa beats Bret to the punch and says she&#39;s not feeling him. Bret tells her, in no uncertain terms, to &quot;get the f--k out&quot;, eliciting cheers from the remaining girls. The passes are distributed and the tour is over for Brittaney and her socks. Everybody leaves the room, leaving Brittaney to stand alone and look increasingly crazier. At least Bret will have her DVDs to keep him company (especially because they don&#39;t talk back!)</p>
<p>Well, my tour ends now too. Maybe I should consider a career in porn? Thanks to everyone who read and supported the site for the past few years - and special thanks to Bret Michaels and his European hair extensions...you will be missed. </p>
<p>&#160;</p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <title>Supernatural: Family Remains (Episode 411)</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/19/supernatural-family-remains-episode-411" />
    <id>http://www.recapist.com/2009/01/19/supernatural-family-remains-episode-411</id>
    <published>2009-01-18T22:00:36-08:00</published>
    <updated>2009-01-18T22:06:50-08:00</updated>
    <author>
      <name>Gemma</name>
    </author>
    <category term="Supernatural" />
    <summary type="html"><![CDATA[<p><span class="inline left"><a href="/parting-is-such-sweet-sorrow"><img src="http://www.recapist.com/files/images/spn411.preview.jpg" alt="Parting is such sweet sorrow." title="Parting is such sweet sorrow."  class="image preview" width="490" height="276" /></a><span class="caption" style="width: 488px;"><strong>Parting is such sweet sorrow.</strong></span></span>Welcome back, everyone! After a long <strike>decade</strike> month of hiatus, show is back!  </p>
<p>In a large farmhouse, a man is eating dinner in front of the TV when his lamp suddenly turns off.  When he gets up to get a new light bulb or something, a door across the room swings open.  Out steps an adolescent girl, deathly pale with tangled black hair and the weirdest looking teeth I have ever seen.  “You?” the man says, clearly terrified.  “That’s impossible!”  He tries to keep the girl away, but she advances anyway, and the man’s blood splatters across a cross-stitched picture reading “Home Sweet Home.”</p>
<p><br class="clear" /></p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></summary>
    <content type="html"><![CDATA[<p><span class="inline left"><a href="/parting-is-such-sweet-sorrow"><img src="http://www.recapist.com/files/images/spn411.preview.jpg" alt="Parting is such sweet sorrow." title="Parting is such sweet sorrow."  class="image preview" width="490" height="276" /></a><span class="caption" style="width: 488px;"><strong>Parting is such sweet sorrow.</strong></span></span>Welcome back, everyone! After a long <strike>decade</strike> month of hiatus, show is back!  </p>
<p>In a large farmhouse, a man is eating dinner in front of the TV when his lamp suddenly turns off.  When he gets up to get a new light bulb or something, a door across the room swings open.  Out steps an adolescent girl, deathly pale with tangled black hair and the weirdest looking teeth I have ever seen.  “You?” the man says, clearly terrified.  “That’s impossible!”  He tries to keep the girl away, but she advances anyway, and the man’s blood splatters across a cross-stitched picture reading “Home Sweet Home.”</p>
<p>WINGS.  TITLE.</p>
<p>The Impala is parked in the middle of Buttfuck, USA.  It’s the middle of the night, and Sam sleeps in the backseat while Dean reads a newspaper.  Sam wakes up and immediately realizes that Dean is searching for another job, even though they just finished a job a few hours before.  It seems that Dean has had them going nonstop for a month now, and Sam says that they need a break.  He also says that Dean needs to stop running from what happened to him in Hell, but Dean ignores this and suggests that they go to the farmhouse we just saw in Stratton, Nebraska, where there appears to be a homicidal ghost.  Sam just lies back down and Dean continues to not sleep.</p>
<p>The boys arrive at the farmhouse and break in.  They go into the shabby kitchen and find a hollow spot on the wall that Sam thinks is a dumbwaiter.  God, I have <em>always</em> wanted one of those.  Remember when Michelle Trachtenberg got to ride in one in <em>Harriet the Spy</em>?  That’s basically my dream.  Anyway, Dean teases Sam about his enormous brain and they go off to investigate the rest of the house.  Unfortunately there are power lines nearby, so the EMF meter is useless.  They open a closet and find a freaky-ass shaved doll head on the floor.  Well, that’s completely normal.  They hear something outside and see that a car and moving van are driving towards the house.  Looks like the house is little more sold than they thought it was.  When the car pulls up a family gets out, consisting of a young son, a teenage daughter, a set of parents and a sarcastic uncle.  Sam and Dean come out of the house, posing as health inspectors, and tell the family that the house in “uninhabitable.”  Though they complain, they agree to stay in a motel for the night.  Is it just me, or is anyone else kind of bored so far?  </p>
<p>The boys go to talk to the victim’s housekeeper, who was the one to find the body.  She gives us the man’s sob story; his wife died in childbirth, and his daughter Rebecca hung herself in the attack twenty years later.  She even has a few pictures of the family, and the daughter looks suspiciously like our homicidal ghost.  The housekeeper also mentions that she sometimes heard rustling in the walls at the house and that both the mother and daughter were cremated.  This pretty much rule both of them out as suspects.  FYI, still bored over here.</p>
<p>Back at the house, the sneaky family has decided to check for potential dangers themselves.  When the contractor uncle says that the house is clean, they commence moving in.  The daughter, Kate, sees the creepy ghost girl in the window, but she disappears and Kate assumes she just imagined her.  Um, if I’d <em>already</em> seen two strange people come out of my house that day who had no logical reason to be there I think I would take seeing a third person a little more seriously.  Her mom Susan assures her that everything will be great here, and Kate agrees that “everything is going to change.”  I smell a traumatic past!  That night, Danny (the young son) is playing video games in his room when his closet door creeks upon.  A ball rolls across the floor to him and he asks who is there.  He rolls the ball back, and the thing in the closet starts up a game of catch with him.  Once again, perfectly normal.  Downstairs, the parents are discussing gardens and vegetables and other very boring things.  Susan abruptly stops and asks what they’re doing, and her husband Brian promises that “everything will be better.”  Oh, will you just spit out what your issues are and get it over with?  I realize that we’re only fifteen minutes into this episode, but it feels like we have been watching these people do nothing forever.  Maybe if they didn’t talk about whatever happened to them in the most roundabout, clichéd terms that we’ve heard a million times I would care, but alas, my cold heart remains unmoved.  The uncle tells the parents to come look at something upstairs, and when they get there we see that the word “GO” has been written on the wall in red crayon.  No one seems particularly startled by this, and they all immediately assume that Danny did it.  Apparently his teacher did say that he might “act out,” and I somehow manage to care even less about whatever they’re talking about.  I also manage to go from feeling indifference towards the uncle to feeling flat out dislike, since he gives his sister an obnoxious “you know what I would do if he were my kid.”  No one asked what you would do, Uncle Sass. When Danny arrives on the scene he says that he didn’t do it, but of course no one believes him.  They believe him even less when he says that the “girl in the walls” did it and send him back to his room.  Let me tell you, this Danny kid is acting circles around all of the adults in this episode.   As he skulks off to his room Danny shouts that “Andy would believe [him],” which means that the traumatic past probably has something to do with this Andy’s death.  Wait for it, wait for it...nope, don’t care.  </p>
<p>Later that night, Kate hears a rustling while she’s lying in bed and assumes it’s their dog Buster.  “Buster” starts licking her hand, which she thinks is gross but not terribly concerning.  Suddenly the door to her room opens and the real Buster strolls in.  Kate looks over just in time to see her closet door slam as whatever was licking her retreats, and she lets out an earsplitting scream.  Can’t really blame her, because that shit was creepy as <em>fuck</em>.  Her whole family gathers in the hall to try and calm her down but only her brother believes that the house is haunted.  There’s a knock on the door and Sam and Dean barge in, alerted by Kate’s scream.  The boys flat out tell the family that they have a ghost, but Brian still isn’t buying it.  Is anyone else getting a really strong asshole vibe from this guy?  Really, all of the adults are rubbing me the wrong way, and I can’t figure out if it’s because they’re genuinely annoying characters or if it’s because they’re getting so much fucking screen time.  The lights cut out, and Danny realizes that Buster slipped out of the door when Sam and Dean entered.  Oh, please don’t go there, show.  There are several grating adults just waiting to be killed off instead of the poor puppy.  Said adults rush outside just in time to hear Buster yelp off-screen, and by the time they find him the ghost has killed him and used his blood to spell out “too late” on the side of the moving van.  And with that this episode just became <em>Secret Window</em>.</p>
<p>Sam and Dean tell Brian and Uncle Sass that they have to get the family out of the house immediately.  The two men don’t even look vaguely concerned but decide to heed the advice anyway.  When they try to leave, however, they find that the tires to all of their vehicles have been slashed, including the Impala’s.  Oh, this shit just got personal!  The Impala’s trunk has been cleaned out as well.  Kate sees Creepy Ghost Girl standing in a field near the house, but when everyone else looks she’s disappeared.  The boys are shocked that Creepy Ghost Girl can leave the house, but they don’t have time to question it.  They heard everyone back inside and enclose them in a salt circle.  We get the standard “You guys hunt ghosts?” “Yes.” “No, seriously?” “Why would we make this shit up?” exchange before Sam whips out the pics they got from the housekeeper and shows them to Kate.  Kate IDs Rebecca the suicide victim as Creepy Ghost Girl, which is surprising since the Rebecca was cremated.  Before the boys can figure out what’s going on, Uncle Sass gets to sassing, saying that he’s not going to sit around and wait for “some backroads hillbilly chick” to “go all Deliverance on [his] ass.”  Dean, who is as fed up with the sass as I am, shoves Uncle Sass against a wall and threatens to pop a few caps if he doesn’t behave.  You tell ‘em, Dean!  Sam brings up the semi-important fact that Dean doesn’t actually have a gun on him, but Dean thinks that irrelevant; he’s not going to let anyone die tonight, no matter what.  Oh, see what just happened there?  This is now about Dean’s issues <strike>as is everything else</strike>.  My guess would be that he’s trying to make up for what he did in Hell, but that’s just a shot in the dark.  </p>
<p>Sam goes to dig around the attic for clues about Rebecca, leaving Dean to babysit the family.  Uncle Sass continues to be rude and sassy, but I have to admit that he gained a couple of points with me my calling Dean “Fonzie.”  I can’t hate on that.  Suddenly a door opens across the room and Creepy Ghost Girl enters.  She walks right up to the salt circle, pauses, whips out a knife, and <em>steps over</em> the line of salt.  Uh oh, curveball!  The family runs outside while Dean swashbuckles with Not So Ghostly But Still Very Creepy Girl.  Sam comes into the room and ends the fight by shining a light the girl’s eyes, making her instantly recoil.  She flees to the closet and disappears.  The boys head outside, where they tell Dad to gather the family.  They have to assume that Not So Ghostly But Still Very Creepy Girl is human, and Dean expresses how much he just doesn’t understand people.  Show, you already did this episode.  It was called “The Benders” and it was awesome.  This?  <em>Substantially</em> less awesome.  Sam mentions that he found Rebecca’s diary in the attic, so he’s going to go through it and see if he can figure out who the girl is.  I’ll bet any amount of money that it’s Rebecca’s illegitimate child.  When Brian brings the family around Sam tells them to head to town on foot.  They agree to go, but realize that Danny is missing.  Parenting fail.</p>
<p>Since it’s not safe for them to go off to town on their own, Susan and Kate wait in a shed while the men look for Danny.  Because this is apparently a man’s world and the woman couldn’t possibly be of any assistance fighting off <em>another woman</em>.  Anyway, Sam and Brian check outside while Dean and Uncle Sass search the house.  They go back to the closet Not So Ghostly But Still Very Creepy Girl came out of and Dean finds a door into the space behind the walls.  Ah, so now this episode is “No Exit.”  I’m not saying situation isn’t creepy, but it (along with the rest of the episode) would be a lot more so if they hadn’t done it before.  They walk behind the walls until they find a hole in the floor leading to another level of the house.  This is probably a really inappropriate time to be reminded of the climbing structure at my local Children’s Museum.  Dean goes down through the whole, chanting “please nobody grab my leg” as he does.  When he gets to the room below he comes face to face with a hanging squirrel and finds half-eaten pieces of Buster all over the place.  Oh, that’s just gross.  The two men continue to explore their respective floors.  Uncle Sass walks around for a minute before coming face to face with Not So Ghostly But Still Very Creepy Girl, and for the love of God, someone tell me what her real name is so I don’t have to keep typing that. The girl stabs him in the throat with a knife, leaving his body hanging through the hole for Dean to find.  </p>
<p>Sam and Brian have joined the <strike>helpless</strike> women in the shed, and they’re all waiting for Dean and Uncle Sass to return.  Dean finally does show up and tells everyone that he didn’t find Danny and that Uncle Sass is dead.  He’s almost as distraught as the family, saying that he “shouldn’t have left him alone.”  Oh, Dean.  They all stay on the shed for a while, giving Sam a chance to read more of Rebecca’s diary and the family a chance to grieve.  Susan is convinced that Danny is dead and wonders why so many bad things happen to their family.  “What happened to Andy happened,” Brian tells her.  “I cannot change that.  But I will find Danny.”  At some point Brian must leave the shed, because we cut to him standing in front of the house.  Yeah, stand alone and out in the open when there’s a psycho killer on the loose, Einstein.  Dean approaches him and asks if Andy was his son.  “Oldest,” Brian says.  “Got himself killed in a car accident last year.”  He goes on to say that they only moved to the country on the advice of his and Susan’s marriage counselor, and he sounds all kinds of bitter that something so horrible still managed to happen to them.  Dean promises to get Danny back and Brian asks why he cares so much, but Sam interrupts before Dean can answer.</p>
<p>The boys head back inside the house and Sam tells Dean that he thinks Not So Ghostly But Still Very Creepy Girl is Rebecca’s daughter.  He also thinks that Rebecca killed herself because “her dad called her a ‘dirty little whore’ and said he was going to lock the baby up where no one could ever see it.”  Why so much shame, you ask?  Sam thinks it’s because the father was also the father of Rebecca’s baby. So let me get this straight; there is now <em>canon</em> incest on this show?  Oh Kripke, way to feed the flames.  I guess that the grossness of the situation could be his attempt to get people to stop wanting Sam and Dean together, but at this point he should realize that that’s not going to happen.  You know that kid from the movie <em>Honey, I Blew Up the Kid</em> that keeps getting bigger and bigger the more he’s exposed to electricity?  Wincest is like that kid, and everything this show does just seems to make it stronger.  Anyway, it looks like Rebecca’s daughter has been locked up for her whole life, which is why she’s barely human.  Yet somehow she is still literate enough to write threatening messages.  Dean almost sympathizes with her, since she’s been through hell her whole life and he actually knows what hell is like.  Cut to a hidden chamber of the house, where Danny is tied up and just regaining consciousness.  For some inexplicable reason this is shot in night vision, but that’s so far down on the list of my problems with this episode.  He’s trying to scream through his gag when Rebecca’s daughter enters the room with a live rat.  She holds it before him like an offering before snapping its spine and chowing done.  How she is not dead from food poisoning, we will never know.</p>
<p>Back in the kitchen, Dean and Sam are breaking down the hollow spot in the wall that they found earlier.  It opens to a tunnel, and they think this is how Rebecca’s father kept his daughter/granddaughter fed.  Brian is with them and wants to go after Danny himself, but Dean pulls the Big Damn Hero card and insists that he go.  Down in the tunnel, Dean finds several of his guns and arms himself.  He finds Danny and frees him, and the boy quickly warms him that the girl’s brother is coming back.  Say WHAT now?  Someone starts making Tasmanian Devil noises and Dean is suddenly attacked.  He fights with the brother while Danny runs to the end of the tunnel, where Sam has thrown down a curtain-rope to get him back into the kitchen.  Dean shines his flashlight in the brother’s eyes, which distracts him long enough for Dean to get his gun.  When the brother attacks again, Dean shoots him point blank.  Meanwhile, the <strike>weak and powerless</strike> women are waiting in the shed.  Someone breaks down one of the windows.  When they retreat to the other side of the shed, they almost get impaled when a knife is thrust through the wall.  They try to keep the girl from getting in, but they don’t have much luck.  Just when the girl is about to start stabbing, someone grabs her from behind and pulls her outside.  The women listen to her screams as she’s hacked to death, and Brian meets them at the door to the shed covered in blood.</p>
<p>The next morning, Dean and Sam finish fixing the Impala and the trunk before saying goodbye to the family.  They’re still pretty shaken up by the ordeal, but they insist that they’ll get through it together.  A while later the boys pull over to the side of the road to eat some food.  Oh, there’s no way this is happening.  Are we seriously getting <em>another</em> roadside confession?  Show, just because you’ve been on hiatus for the last <strike>century</strike> month doesn’t mean that we don’t remember how the last episode ended.  Dean admits that he felt for the incestuous twins, since he understands how “lifelong torture can turn you into something like that.”  Sam insists that Dean is nothing like those monsters.  Is that the parallel that we’re supposed to have drawn from this episode?  Because I didn’t get that at all.  Dean agrees with Sam, but he thinks that he’s even worse than the wall-dwellers.  “I enjoyed it, Sam,” he says.  “They took me off the rack and I tortured souls and I liked it.”  This is probably a really, really inappropriate time to start singing “he tortured souls and he liked it!” in the style of Katy Perry, but lord knows I need something to distract me from this overused sequence.  Dean goes on, saying that, no matter how many people he saves, it will never make up for what he’s done.  ‘I’ll never be able to fill this whole,” he says while Sam stares at him.  “Not ever.”</p>
<p>So that’s it folks!  Y’all might have heard by now that Buzznet has decided not to pay its recappers anymore.  While we’re invited to continue as volunteer recappers (and thanks so much for giving us that <em>privilege</em>, Buzznet), I will no longer be working here.  Don’t get me wrong, I love recapping and I especially love recapping <em>Supernatural</em>, but it’s far too much work to continue without compensation.  I really want to thank everyone who reads these recaps as well as those who comment.  I can’t even tell you how pathetically happy getting your positive feedback has made me.  Seriously, it’s really sad.  I got a better reception than I ever thought I would and you guys made this experience totally worthwhile.  I only wish that I could have gone out on a better episode, because anyone reading my last three recaps would think that I hated this show.  Which is NOT TRUE AT ALL.  I love this show in a borderline unhealthy way, and I hope that showed even when I was yelling at it for being so sucky.  If y’all ever want to gush or rant about this wonderful and frustrating show in the future, just ask for my Livejournal in the comments.  May the guy love always be strong, may the manpain always be palpable, and may the Impala always be on the road.</p>
<br class="clear" />    ]]></content>
  </entry>
</feed>
