The Hills: Drama Follows Them (Episode 402)

I just finished watching this episode two minutes ago and can I even remember what happened? Did anything happen? People worked (sorta), as per usual. There was brunch and a birthday party at a nightclub that looked exactly like every other nightclub we've seen in the history of this show. Or maybe I'm just a cynic.

In any case, I'm doing bullet points but if you want to know what happened, ever so briefly, here it is: Lo and Audrina are still not speaking, Lauren's still dating Doug, they all go to Stephanie's birthday party at Boulevard 3, where the appearance of Spencer and Heidi with a huge bunch of cheap balloons sends Lauren, Lo, Doug, Brody, and Frankie running for, um, the hills. Aren't I clever? Elsewhere, Whitney is called up to the majors at People's Revolution when Kelly fires Jessica. Which was no surprise, as this has been news for a while.

• Doug has no game. Conversational game, that is. I tune out his drone whenever he's on camera. How does Lauren put up with it?
• Lo and Audrina -- still not talking.
• Audrina and Epic Records -- still not working. Does she just go there to talk to Chiara?
• Spencer, stop with the beard.
• Working dinner with Kelly Cutrone is bloodsport. Just ask Jessica. Oh wait, you can't, because she gets fired at the end of the episode and Whitney is promoted to her gig
• The way Kelly makes it sound, living a bi-coastal "lifestyle" is immensely difficult and important and oh my god I'm kinda jealous except that I don't think I'd want to work for Kelly.
• Stephanie is so getting up by both Lauren and Spencer. So can we blame her when we find out next week? or in some other upcoming episode? that she's going to date Doug? I think not.

No poll, this week. But I've updated my sad Google 'Hills' map. Check it out!