The Amazing Race: Honestly, They Have Witch Powers or Something! (Episode 12.08)

This week, the Final Five travel to Mumbai, India, Kynt & Vyxsin play the roles of TK & Rachel, and the Speed Bump proves to be an annoyance (although not as large of an annoyance as Nate & Jennifer, a.k.a. Nate-n-Hate).

Freshly inked Don & Nick, who placed first in the previous leg after getting Fast Forward tattoos, depart at 10:12 p.m. Teams will fly almost 4000 miles to Mumbai, formerly Bombay, India. Ah, India. Home to several classic meltdowns because of player fatigue and India's differences from every other nation. After they land, the pairs will travel by auto-rickshaw to find the M.R. Naik newspaper stall in Khar Danda. Teams must buy a Times of India newspaper and search for an ad telling them the location of their next clue.

Don & Nick use the internet to find the best flight, which is on Air France and lands in Mumbai at 10:30 the next evening. Their departure time from Florence is 6:50 a.m., so Gramps... and The Boy get a room to get some much needed rest. Nate-n-Hate rip their clue at 11:55 p.m. "We just need to remember how embarrassed and disgusting it was before, the way that we were acting," Hate mangles in an interview about — what else? — her relationship with Nate. Bets on this strategy succeeding? Zero. They take a taxi to the airport, which is closed. Ron & Chris depart 11 minutes later. Father and daughter, like Don & Nick, reserve tickets for the 6:50 a.m. flight. Then, like Nate-n-Hate, they camp outside the airport. TK & Rachel leave the mat at 2:11 a.m, and Kynt & Vyxsin follow at 3:23 a.m. Vyxsin flashes back to Kynt's car freakout and emphasizes how rarely she and Kynt aren't N Sync. Sorry, in sync.

The airport opens at 4:30, but ticket counters don't open for another hour. Don & Nick arrive, refreshed after several hours of sleep in a hotel, and wait in line with Ron & Chris at the Air France counter. Hate sighs, "I'm just so confused why we can't get the flights like everyone else... ahead of time." Er. She and Nate score the last two tickets on the Air France flight, inspiring TK & Rachel to go to the Lufthansa counter and book a connection through Frankfurt that will get them to India at 1:00 a.m. Kynt & Vyxsin stay at the Air France counter and find a flight through Amsterdam that arrives in Mumbai at 10:50 a.m. They do a little playacting, pretending to be upset, and TK & Rachel buy it. The first flight is delayed, so the Goths are the first on the ground. In the end, none of the intrigue or delays matter because the news stall doesn't open until 6 a.m. So that's one night of camping outside of an airport, followed by an all day flight, and capped off with another evening "sleeping" outside. This is rough, and you know it's going to take its toll.

It's still dark when the teams buy their papers. Some pairs look together, others split up the job by taking separate sections. TK is using a pen to check off ads he's read, and Nick decides to stand near them to try and get an idea of where the ad is if TK & Rachel find it before he and Don do. Nate-n-Hate, astonishingly, complain and yell. Kynt & Vyxsin are the first see instructions to take an auto-rickshaw to Chauhan Alteration Tailors at Saint Joseph Church Road, near A. B. Nair Road corner, Juhu. Also, there's a Speed Bump box next to the shop. Ron & Chris are second to find the ad, then TK & Rachel. Don & Nick also score, leaving Nate-n-Hate in last. Aw.

Rickshaw tomfoolery ensues, and Don & Nick are the first to the Detour: Paste 'Em or Thread 'Em. Paste 'Em requires teams to glue six large panels of a Bollywood poster to an underpass wall near Dadar West Bridge. In Thread 'Em, pairs must go to the Dadar Flower Market and make a traditional wedding garland of 108 red, yellow, and orange marigolds. Gandfather and grandson choose Paste 'Em, as Don was in the printing business. Ron & Chris arrive second and also take the poster Detour. TK & Rachel decide to Thread 'Em, as Rachel has worked with flowers for the past several years.

Kynt & Vyxsin arrive at Chauhan Tailors to discover that they must travel to Daria Mahal and perform several complicated yoga poses to complete their Speed Bump. They have the option of performing it before or after their Detour, and they decide to "take a break for a moment and do some yoga," Kynt says. Back at the news stand, Nate-n-Hate finally find the ad and catch a rickshaw. Oddly enough, they are still fairly calm — for them. I know, it's relative.

Taxi tomfoolery ensues, and Ron & Chris arrive to Paste 'Em before Don & Nick. Ron reverts to his charming self, berating his daughter when she tries to help him and yelling at the judge for "changing" his mind. It's as uncomfortable as ever, and as Chris once again takes over for her flustered father, Don & Nick complete the task efficiently and quietly. Teams must go to Kabutar Khana, a traffic Island for their next clue. Caution: U-Turn ahead.

At the garland-making mats, TK counts out the flowers and puts them in order as Rachel strings them. Nate-n-Hate choose to Thread 'Em, and Kynt & Vyxsin continue pose in increasingly difficult ways. Kynt slys, "Hey, any chance to see Vyxsin twisting, turning, and contorting her body was always a highlight for me... and, I think, was a highlight for the instructor as well." Considering that yoga is often thought of as a way to search for spiritual understanding and experience, I think the instructor didn't give a damn about The Pinks, as some of the Racers call the Goths. They finish the moves and return to the Detour, choosing Thread 'Em.

Nate-n-Hate arrive at the flower market as TK & Rachel complete their garland. Rachel asks, "Got everything?" as she stands up; she and TK are obviously much more aware of making sure they have all of their stuff. They leave for Kabutar Khana. Nate-n-Hate are about halfway through the task when the Goths arrive. It's hard to tell which team is more shocked, but each behaves characteristically: Kynt & Vyxsin work calmly and Nate-n-Hate insult each other and bitch back and forth. It's predictable and repetitive. "The tone in your voice is making me absolutely sick," Hate grits out. Because she always has such dulcet tones when she shrieks.

At Paste 'Em, Chris tears down her father's work and starts again, pleading with Ron the whole time to not antagonize the judge, who finally approves of Chris's work. TK & Rachel are team number one at the U-Turn. They don't use it. Nick & Don, in second place, also don't use the U-Turn. Ron & Chris don't U-Turn, but Chris admits if she and her dad would have used it on Nick & Don has she and Ron gotten their first. The teams must now go to Bharatgas Colaba Gas Service for the Roadblock. One player must deliver six tanks of propane gas to two separate addresses in "the mean streets of Mumbai." The vehicle is a sort of bicycle cart, and players must get receipts at each address. To get the next clue, the team member must turn over all four slips of paper — the two order slips and the two receipts. Thanks to ensuing taxi tomfoolery, Nick & Don get there first. Nick takes the Roadblock. Ron & TK soon follow.

Nate-n-Hate finish their garland, but they are so frazzled that they first try to give it to a flower vendor and then an elephant, even though the clue clearly reads "bridegroom." Kynt & Vyksin are right behind them. Each team grabs a cab to Kabutar Khana, and Kynt & Vyxsin get to the U-turn first. The Goths make their first major mistake as they choose to U-Turn... Nick & Don. D'oh! They explain it's because that team is almost always slower. Nate-n-Hate cannot believe they themselves haven't been U-Turned, and where is karma now, huh?

Propane delivery shenanigans occur, with Nick and Ron getting incorrect directions from locals, and TK hauling three cans at a time up several flights of stairs. TK completes his deliveries first, and he and Rachel are team number one on the Pit Stop mat at Bandra Fort. They win a five-day trip to St. Maarten, which sounds lovely. Nick & Don are team number two, having to pull over their taxi so Nick can throw up at the side of the road. Yikes. Ron & Chris finish in third place.

Kynt and Hate choose the Roadblock, and they are neck and neck. Hate forgets to take the receipt at her first delivery, but realizes her error when the second client asks, "Forget anything?" Hate backtracks to get her first receipt. However, Kynt makes his team's second mistake — he leaves the delivery slips with the customers instead of keeping them. He has to go back and get them, so Nate-n-Hate are still in The Race, finishing as team number four.

And the Goths are eliminated. Phil is sad to see them go, but he "would have to give the the award for the most fashionable couple ever on The Amazing Race." Ooooh, Phil, NO. I wonder was the Guidos would say to that. I think Phil means that Kynt & Vyxsin maintained their look most consistently throughout the Race, and I can't disagree with that. They both look genuinely excited by this "award." Heh. Except for several of Kynt's twee comments, I ended up liking these "couple of Goth kids from Louisville, Kentucky." They truly enjoyed each place they traveled, and it's too bad that they didn't knock out Nate-n-Hate.

At this point, I feel as if the recaps can write themselves: Don gets tired, and Nick picks up the slack. Ron yells at Chris, who somehow manages to complete tasks as he bristles. TK & Rachel use their mellow approach and laidback ways to avoid elimination. Nate-n-Hate overreact, whine, and argue with each other constantly. Which means, of course, that they are destined to win it all.

Next week: Don's age catches up to him, and TK & Rachel break off from the group.

LEG 8: Florence, Italy, to Mumbai, India (via Paris, Amsterdam, or Frankfurt)

PIT STOP: Bandra Fort, Mumbai, India

DETOUR:
Paste 'Em (paste movie poster to the wall):
Don & Nick
Ron & Christina

Thread 'Em (assemble wedding garland):
TK & Rachel
Nate & Jennifer
Kynt & Vyxsin

U-TURN: Used by Kynt & Vyxsin on Don & Nick, who already completed their Detour

SPEED BUMP: Kynt & Vyxsin (perform yoga routine)

ROADBLOCK: ("Who's got a strong back and good navigational skills?")
1st: TK
2nd: Nick
3rd: Ron
4th: Jennifer
5th: Kynt

LEADERBOARD
Team Number 1: TK & Rachel [previously finished 3rd, 6th, 2nd, 7th, 1st, 4th, 4th]
PRIZE: five-day trip to St. Maarten
Team Number 2: Don & Nick [previously finished 5th, 8th, 6th, 4th, 6th, 5th, 1st]
Team Number 3: Ron & Christina [previously finished 8th, 9th, 5th, 3rd, 3rd, 1st, 3rd]
Team Number 4: Nate & Jennifer [previously finished 10th, 2nd, 3rd, 2nd, 5th, 3rd, 2nd]
ELIMINATED: Kynt & Vyxsin [previously finished 2nd, 4th, 4th, 5th, 2nd, 2nd, 5th]
ELIMINATED: Azaria & Henekea [previously finished 1st, 5th, 1st, 1st, 4th]
ELIMINATED: Shana & Jennifer [previously finished 6th, 3rd, 7th, 6th]
ELIMINATED: Jason & Lorena [previously finished 4th, 1st, 8th]
ELIMINATED: Marianna & Julia [previously finished 9th, 7th]
ELIMINATED: Kate & Pat [previously finished 7th]
ELIMINATED: Ari & Staella