Bones - Episode 221 - The Glowing Bones in the Old Stone House

Oh, give me an effing break. The main plot of this episode was basically a big ol' tongue kiss between corporate siblings FOX and MySpace. Forgive me if I gloss over that and spend more time on the important part of the episode - whether Hodgins and Angela are getting married. I have my priorities, people.

A plot: Meet Carly. She's a famous chef who owns a famous mac and cheese restaurant in DC. Except that should be past tense because Carly's now dead and decomposing in an old house in the woods. Also, her bones are glowing, but experts assure Brennan and Booth that she's not radioactive. Guess she just has a sparking personality. Er...had. Brennan is kinda bummed about Carly's death, since they had befriended each other at Carly's restaurant and Carly had promised to teach Brennan how to cook. Still, she and the squints focus on the job (after Cam jokes that they can twirl Carly's glowing bones and imagine they're at a rave, a far different attitude than her "Respect the dead!" one last week. Consistent characterization, plz.) and determine that Carly was stabbed by a very sharp knife.

Meet Ernie, Carly's high school sweetheart, but they weren't sleeping together. He's a sushi chef and he was teaching her to prepare sushi, including sea urchin. That explains the glowing bones, since chefs frequently cut their hands and the sea urchin contained a bacteria that caused the phosphorescence. He's also not Carly's killer and he's red herring number one. Meet Dan, Carly's husband. He's the co-owner in her restaurant, he's the sole beneficiary of her considerable estate, he drinks, and he's the jealous type. But he's not Carly's killer. That's red herring number two. Meet Ben, Dan and Carly's best friend and another partner in the restaurant. He has a girlfriend, Abby, who went missing the same night Carly died. He was banging Carly in the backseat of Abby's car, but he didn't kill her. Red herring number three. And finally, meet Abby. She's Carly's best friend and Ben's girlfriend. She disappeared the night Carly died but she's found 36 hours later, locked in the trunk of her car. Hodgins and Brennan, having been buried alive, feel sympathetic, but it's wasted on her. Abby deliberately crashed her car, stabbed Carly with a donated ceramic knife because Carly was sleeping with her boyfriend, then locked herself in the trunk to make it look like a carjacker attacked them. She knew she'd be found quickly because the wooded area was popular with hunters but the rain kept her trapped in her own pee in the trunk for a bit longer than she expected. When Booth and Brennan confront her with the evidence, she sobs pitifully in her hospital bed. She's not a red herring, and she's going to prison.

At the end of the episode, Brennan cooks dinner for Booth. It's mac and cheese, of course. Booth takes a bite and is deeply impressed by Brennan's mad culinary skillz. In fact, he flat out says he might need to spend some time alone with his dinner. Ew. Also, hee. But mostly ew. Still, Brennan looks pleased and says she added some fresh ground nutmeg, saying that Carly taught her to go with her instincts. Booth tells her that her instincts are good and they twinkle cutely at each other as the credits roll.

B plot: Are Angela and Hodgins getting married? Are they? Huh? HUH? Seriously, with the way everyone is all a-twitter over this, they're like yappy little dogs. But who am I kidding? I'm also dying to know. Booth and Brennan dish about it at the beginning of the episode, with Brennan on the anti-marriage side and Booth all for the nuptials. They bicker about it so much that the cop investigating the scene with them asks how long they've been dating. Hee. At the lab, Hodgins is a little irritated that everyone is gossiping about him and Angela but, dude, you're the one who keeps making out with her all over the workplace. Boundaries go both ways. He insists that he and Angela are fine and they are, but I think he's also still baffled as to why she won't say yes. Which is understandable, because he is Hodgins and made of awesome.

Angela has a couple of heart to heart conversations with her BFF, Brennan. She doesn't entirely understand herself what's holding her back since she loves Hodgins and Brennan isn't much help, as they both know that Brennan feels marriage is an outdated institution. Still, Brennan admits that she eventually wants to feel the same kind of love that Angela and Hodgins feel for each other. Hodgins must have decided at some point that Booth is his BFF, since he asks Booth for advice. Or, rather, he yammers completely nonsensically at Booth, confusing the both of us. Seriously, I've re-watched this scene three times and I still have no idea what he was actually saying. I think it was the verbal diarrhea equivalent of this: "Maybe I should back off a little, since Angela and I have only been dating about six months." Just a guess. Anyway, then Hodgins hugs Booth and Booth's exasperated "WTF?" face made me wheeze with laughter for about ten minutes straight.

After the case has been solved, Hodgins is in the lab playing with his shrimp. No, that's not a euphemism. Angela joins him and whines that it smells like stinky fish. Hee. He tells her that he's perfectly happy with their relationship being as it is and he's not going to pressure her into getting married. He has her cover her eyes and she agreeably does, as he leads her over to the table and turns out the lights. He tells her to open her eyes and she looks down to see that he's shaped bacteria-glowy seafood into hearts and the words "Be My Love." Awwwwwwwww. Gross, but very sweet. Angela is incredibly charmed by this and tells him yes. Hilariously, Hodgins is all, "Um...what?" He tells her that the fish love sign was not another proposal and she says she knows, that now she's asking him to marry her. Gazing at her adoringly, he calls her insane and says yes, then starts musing about a wedding in Italy in a few months. She giggles and shoots that idea down and insists on them getting married next week, in case she changes her mind. She also wants a big wedding, the whole works, and I guess if your boyfriend/fiance is a millionaire who will give you the moon than a big wedding in a week is a piece of cake. Tasty, tasty wedding cake. Hodgins calls her insane again and they smile happily at each other and kiss. Yay!

Best line of the episode: "Ugh, you guys have to stop mounting each other in the office." - Cam. It's true, but if I looked like either Hodgins or Angela, I would not be able to stop macking on myself, either.

Best scene of the episode: There are so, so many to choose from but I really loved the second talk Angela and Brennan had, with Brennan poignantly confessing that she wants what Angela and Hodgins have someday.